Grand Theft Auto

As you know, Grandma is always accusing Aunt Dee of stealing worthless crap. She works herself into a venomous state until I locate the clothespins or whatever has been "stolen." However, Aunt Dee has one item that my grandma could actually make a legitimate claim of thievery on, and yet Grandma doesn't even realize it. Aunt Dee has her car. Irony, huh?

A couple of years ago, when her dementia started to become more pronounced, Grandma called a cousin of ours in a fury. "My car has been stolen! Somebody stole my car!" Our cousin lives close by, so he came to help Grandma and pick her up. He found that the car had not been stolen, Grandma had forgotten where she parked. After this incident my dad and Aunt Dee decided it just wasn't safe for Grandma to be on the road. She would surely keep reporting the car "stolen" or worse, end up driving somewhere and not remembering where she was or how to get home. Rather than tempt fate, my aunt took the car and Grandma's been without wheels ever since.

Grandma sorely misses the independence and frequently starts sentences with "If I had my car still..." or "Wouldn't it be nice if we had a car..." She always brings up the notice she got from the DMV to retake her driving test. She's recently decided that I have a car and can drive us around. I hate to point out to her that I don't have a car either.

Maybe the saddest twist in the story is that when Aunt Dee takes us out, she uses Grandma's car. You'd think Grandma would live for this. She's got Aunt Dee red-headed, blatantly using a stolen item! But she doesn't. She doesn't recognize it any more. Instead she just walks to the car and says, "Oh, where are we going? I don't get out as much as I used to. I miss having a car."